There, above the tree line of the park: a giant green head, swiveling, turning to take bites out of buildings which it then spits out. The monsters have never come back that fast, and he doesn’t see any now. He’s been off the meds for barely a day, although he already feels more like himself. When he sees monsters, other people think he’s the monster. He always winds up doing something people around him consider dangerous, like yelling or running into traffic. Why take the chance?Īny recurrence of monsters means that, sooner or later, Caleb will be heading back to the hospital. He only walked through one once, and it didn’t seem angry, but that one was little, a baby. But he’d be mad if someone walked through him, and he doesn’t want to piss off the monsters. Walking through monsters smells awful, like sulfur and shit, which Caleb supposes are what his own insides smell like, too. Other people can’t see them and think Caleb’s weird when he dodges to get out of their way, although he’d rather duck monsters than be zoned-out on meds. The monsters themselves, vague whispering forms looming around corners and above trees, are less frightening than the problems they cause. Journal Prompt: How do you know when you’re starting to spiral down or go into a relapse? What can you do to take care of yourself when this happens?Ĭaleb has always known he’s going to a bad place when the monsters came back. The journal was the only good thing about the hospital. Writing in the journal during group reminded him that, no matter what the doctors and social workers said about recovery and staying on your meds, freedom means staying off meds and out of places that make you take them. He also has the pencil and pocket journal the hospital gave him for afternoon group, where the social workers used writing prompts to help the patients explore their feelings. The hospital served hot dogs sometimes, but they never tasted right. He has a little money and plans to buy a hot dog as soon as he finds someone selling them. Caleb’s drenched just from walking, but that’s okay it’s so much better than the dry, sterile air in the hospital. Clouds build overhead, promising rain that will be a relief from the overwhelming humidity. Very few group homes will take people diagnosed with psychosis, and the fight he picked probably means that there’s now one fewer.īut now he’s free, walking through the park. He feels a little guilty about that, because he knows the social workers worked their asses off to get him that spot. That’s why, when the hospital sent him to the group home, he picked a fight to get kicked out. Meds make him so slow and heavy he doesn’t recognize himself.
But he’s not going to take the meds here, on the outside. He dutifully took their pills when he was locked up, because otherwise, they just get a court order to force you. Caleb was released from the hospital this morning, not because he’s well-he knows he’ll never be what the doctors call well-but because they had nothing left to offer him. Journal Prompt: What does freedom mean to you? How do you know when you’re free?įreedom means walking through the park on a cloudy Tuesday afternoon, instead of being locked up in the hospital or a group home. Series: The Tales of Gorlen Vizenfirthe.Series: From the Lost Travelers’ Tour Guide.People of Colo(u)r Destroy Science Fiction!.
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